Perfecting the Packages

I am a stay at home wife/mom. I am starting my own business promoting Visalus, but if you want to know more about that check out my other blog here.

But I am home all day and I have spent countless hours browsing pinterest and blogs to find ways to make the best care packages possible for the most amazing man in the world, my husband.

I know he has the worst job in all of this. He's working 12+ hour days and getting a day off every 2 weeks. He's in the desert, working in intense heat and missing his home and family. I am here in the comforts of the home he has provided for us with our kids and my family here to help support and help me. Like I said, he has it rough.

I'm the kind of girl who is independent, but I LOVE taking care of my family. I love to dote, support, encourage and pour my passion and affection into my husband. He's my best friend, my everything. Which is why having him deployed is so difficult. But I've found ways to help get me through it, one day at a time.

One of my favorite things is putting together care packages for him. I really want to make him the perfect package that will make his entire week, until the following when he gets another box from me :-) I want the other men in the company to be jealous of the boxes my husband gets.

SO here is what I've learned. Make them FUN. Use the knowledge you have of your spouse and find their favorite snacks, what makes them comfortable, what makes them smile, what they NEED and get it to them. My husband works a lot and even though they have a PX over there it doesn't carry the stuff he likes, so I keep track of his toiletries and things he needs and make sure he doesn't run out of those. I have a list of his favorite snacks and foods so if he misses going to the DFAC (their version of a cafeteria) for a meal he has food in his room and doesn't have to go without.

For my husband he LOVES the Dallas Cowboys so I picked out his sheets and sent him a blanket all in cowboys colors. I also got him a pillow he could snuggle with and got a pillow case that has a special message from me written on it and handprints from the kids. It's really wrinkled in the pictures because I used vacuum seal bags to send it :-)

One box that I've done for him took a lot of work, but it was worth it. He loves batman, so I made a batman themed package that is completely full of things that are both practical and fun.

Another important aspect to keep in mind is what he misses most from home. We have two small boys and he really misses our sons. So I try and make things that will help keep him connected to them. Handprints on just about anything :-) Any type of picture or craft. They're gone, so anything that their kids actually make for them, they will love. If you want some ideas check out pinterest they have so many things that are easy to make even if you aren't the most crafty person in the world.

(My son decorated that pumpkin for Daddy)

(My oldest has this crazy obsession with rubbing your arm, so I made a small hand of Colton's so Daddy could wear this in his sleeve and Colton could rub Daddy's arm from 7000+ miles away)

(Colton made the cross in Sunday School)

BAKE! haha they LOVE homemade food and miss it! So you can bake just about anything in a jar and mail it. You can learn about how to can here, it's super easy! My next project is going to be making spaghetti sauce and sending it.

(This is a brownie)

Decorate the sides of the boxes. My husband cuts these off and hangs them on the walls of his room. I just cut a piece of scrapbooking paper in half and it covers two of the sides of the box. I use the heavy duty stick glue and it holds it really good.

I usually spend anywhere from 15 minutes to a few hours putting together a box depending on what theme I'm doing. I spend more on holiday themed boxes like the halloween box I just completed.

Or the batman themed box where I made a few things to go with it.

But I view this as a way I can still take care of my husband and SHOW him just how much I love him. It can really wear on them emotionally and mentally to complete the mission over there, so this is my way of reminding him of the things he loves and enjoys and how much we love and support him. This helps bridge the gap for me and makes me feel connected to him in spite of the 7000+ miles between us.

So get your pen and paper out and start making a list of the thing your spouse enjoys. In no time at all you'll have the inspiration you need to put together the perfect packages for your spouse. Use pinterest and take some time when you shop to look for fun things to use/send. Also craft stores like Hobby Lobby have great crafts that your kids can make that are already assembled to some degree.

Also just a tip for all those who hate the post office. Here is a few steps to make your life so much easier and avoid the post office which you'll especially appreciate around the holidays!!

Step 1: Order flat rate boxes and the customs form envelopes for free from usps.com and have them shipped to your house.

Step 2: Package your box at home at whatever pace you need in order to get everything in it that you want or can make fit :-)

Step 3: Go back to usps.com and print off the shipping label and complete the customs form

Step 4: Print, put in your customs form envelopes and stick it on the top of the box

Step 5: Schedule a pickup from your front porch (or wherever you like) at usps.com and never even have to leave your house


Now go make the perfect care package for your spouse!! It'll make both of ya'll feel better. Remember you are one more day closer to them being home and in your arms again!

My coping method #1

Sometimes I just don’t know what to say. It’s so frustrating to be feeling so many emotions and not be able to express them with words. I say I love you and I miss you as if that explains how I’m feeling. But it doesn't  It doesn't express how I feel like I’m drowning. Like the weight of the world is crushing down on me and I just can’t get a breath of air. I try to fight my way to the surface but if just feels like I’m giving it everything I have and I’m just not getting any closer. It’s just that I’m so tired…

I’m tired of doing it on my own. I don’t blame you and I know if you could you would be here to help me. But I’m tired. I’m tired of making this sacrifice. I know there’s a really good reason that we’re doing this.  The main reasons are sleeping peacefully on the couch right now. But I’m tired of you missing them growing up. I’m tired of you missing the special moments that you only get to experience once. I’m tired of watching our toddler cry cause he misses his daddy. I’m tired of trying to explain it to him even when I know he can’t understand why you’re gone.

I’m tired of sleeping in bed alone…well until both our boys end up in it. Even still it feels too big. I’m tired of missing you, of missing reaching over and touching you in the middle of the night, or just so I could fall asleep. I miss cuddling with you, until you would start to snore. I miss making love to you when we could stay awake long enough. I’m tired of waking up looking for you and feeling that same horrible feeling every morning where I realize you’re gone and won’t be home for a long time.

I’m tired of you being gone. I’m tired of being strong. I’m tired because without you here I just can’t relax and I won’t be able to until I’m in your arms again. I’ll be tired until you are home and I can breathe again. 

Finding your coping method

People say that in order to deal with a deployment you just have to stay busy. Well you know what I say…sometimes you can be in the midst of being “busy” and still be just as miserable as ever. I say you need to find ways to deal with the circumstances and help make you into the best person you can be. Because when we’re forced to deal with so much on our own and we’re missing the best half of ourselves, we tend to not be the best version of ourselves.

I have found that I am not as good of a parent or as good of a person without my husband home. There is some epic truth in the cheesy line from the movies, “you make me a better man” but my spouse has made me a better person. But without him here I struggle. So finding ways to help you deal with the frustration, the anger, the loneliness, and worst of all, the fear, can help you get through it.

For me dealing with a lot of the frustration is worked out through walking…a lot. I picture myself how I want to look and I imagine myself looking like that as I jump into his arms when he comes home. That helps motivate me as I push myself to keep walking. To help deal with the other mess of emotions I face, I write.

I haven’t written in years. 

I used to write a lot and I used to write really well. But I pulled from my feelings of inadequacy and fear of never finding someone who would love me. When I did find that amazing someone, I had trouble writing. Negative feelings apparently make better muses for writing. So find things that you enjoy that can help you deal with this deployment. Cause sometimes that’s all you can do, you can’t be happy or positive about it, all you can do is just deal.

Whatever you do, don’t be afraid of being honest. I mean you need to be strong for your spouse…he’s got a lot to deal with too and worrying about whether or not you can hack it is not helpful to him especially if it’s all the time. Everyone is different so only you and your hubby can find ways to deal with the deployment and what you can or can’t talk about it. But if your hubby can’t deal with it then find someone that you can talk to. Cause you can’t bottle it all up, you've got to find a way to let go.

Make some goals!! Start a list and give yourself something to be passionately focused on and something you can do for your soldier. That way when the pain, the anger and the loneliness is gone you don’t regret the time you wasted pining for your soldier. Do something productive that way you have something to be proud of besides surviving the deployment. Do more than survive… conquer.